Roots

Who knew I would ever be so excited to see dark roots?! I noticed in the mirror last night that there were small swirls of dark hair in the back of my head. I got a hand mirror to double check in the reflection. Mixed in with the white was some dark hair. I asked my work colleagues and sure enough they all saw the dark hairs. It was not a dream. I think I may hold off on the coloring just to see what happens. I am just glad it is seemingly on its way.

It's odd that it seems to be growing when I am emotionally strong. Just last night a woman approached me at work and exclaimed "What did you do to your hair?!" Mind you I have never met nor seen this woman at the library. I calmly said it fell out with no explanation. She asked if I had cancer. (Standard) When I replied no she just repeated--"it fell out." Yes. Then she totally changed gears and asked me if I modeled. It was hilarious. But the remarkable part was that I did not cry, get upset or apologize for having short locks. I have broken down from comments like this in the past and it just sort of rolled off me and had a laugh about it. I am embracing these small victories and reminding myself how far I have come.

I knew it!

Today I went to yet another follow up appointment at the dermatologist. It was a great progress report because since I have been using the squaric acid, my hair has doubled in volume and length. Sure, it has no pigment, but it's real hair! My suspicions were confirmed and the hair is actually terminal (as opposed to baby fine hair that would eventually fall out again.) The AA is still attacking the pigmented cells but not the entire follicle. The doctor has upped the strength of my minoxidil/squaric acid compound. I feel no irritation where I should. While I do think this is aiding in my hair's recovery, I do believe the most important treatment was the reduction in stress and useful meditation techniques. It all is part of the process. I sort of knew I was healing but it was nice to have the confirmation. Yay!

It is also safe to dye. The only question now is--what color?! (Pink, green, blue) Life is too short for boring hair. If I fully recover I swear I will never complain about a bad hair cut or bad hair day.

Kindness

A woman approached me at work the other day and asked if my hair had fallen out. She told me her hair fell out when she had chemo and it grew in like mine (white) and then came in green from the radiation. She used a raw coconut oil that her brother made from Puerto Rico and she offered to bring some in for me. She said it soothed her scalp and helped re-gain pigment into her now amazingly curly hair. We had a nice discussion and two days later she came in with a jar of the oil. I couldn't believe it. It makes me so happy to see that people can be so kind. After all, I mostly notice people staring at me at the gym, wondering if I have cancer. The oil is so soothing and smells so great. I am sure it will be just as effective as the other aromatherapy oils but this one means a lot to me. It smells amazing and reminds me to be open-minded and supportive of those who may need it.

Added bonus: My cat really likes coconut oil. I had some on my hand and she kept trying to lick it off. When I realized what she wanted I put it a tiny scoop in her food bowl. She needed some kindness too ;)